San Francisco Jazz Tribe

Tribe composition: In the first degree of separation, there are about 75 of us, at the next degree, we expand to 550. By the 3rd degree, there are hundreds of people connected.

Tribe activities: Jazz, BBQ, movies, sitting around in coffee shops, over-analyzed discussions on relationships, dating and the differences between men and women.

How the Tribe formed: Very organically. There are several people in the group we refer to as "connectors." When a Connector meets a good person, they introduce them to the rest of the group.

Things about the Tribe: We hold a monthly party at my favorite Jazz Club to allow us a scheduled time to hang out and see one another between our busy schedules. Since the event is always on the 2nd Tuesday of the month, everyone can plan for it. Of course, the bulk of our interactions are spontaneous.

Since everyone is friends with everyone else in the group, there is a built-in redundancy. If Jack is not available for a spontaneous BBQ, perhaps Jill is, and so on.

Although there has been our fair share of dating within the circle, it has mostly been either random or non-emotional connections.

The greatest irony is how we all seem to complain we cannot find someone to date that we enjoy as much as we enjoy our friends. Yet we never date one another.